Reciprocity is something I've been sitting with for so long in regards to social media. The quick scrolling and mindless nature of it has created this environment where everything is desensitized, and there isn't any honor for the depth of what people are showing up with and sharing. And, more importantly, honor for what they surely have walked through to be able to show up with that. I feel like we spoke about this over matcha. So I hear you, and I see you, and also celebrate you. Your presence is a beautiful light. xo
Definitely. I have noticed that since short form video content is more and more prioritized, no one cares to read the long captions or engage with the actual people they follow. Like years ago, I'd hardly ever go to my discover page and now that's where the majority of my consumption lies. All of the love right back at you, my dear. Glad to be in this work alongside you x
Such an important article Nikki. I always wonder what would life have been like or be like now if I didn’t work so much or waste my time on social media. What would I be doing? I’m going to put some walls up too and see what it feels like. You are an inspiration to me. You are a lighthouse in a storm. Thank you for risking and sharing!
Love you so much! Thank you for the support. I like to ask myself when I am in a loop of mindless scrolling, "what is something more supportive that I could be doing right now?" Or...can I face a few moments of just doing nothing? (Sounds scary lol)
Hi Nikki! In true "me" form....I am just finding this. Thank you so much for reading my book and for loving all over the pages in the very way I hoped readers would. Seeing it here all these months later has made my day. Love the whole thing actually. Xx Jess
Hi Jess! It means so much to me that you read this and commented. Your book was one of my favorite reads of last year and I have a feeling I will continue to return to it over and over again. Thank you for writing it! And for sharing all that you do. I hope one day our paths cross and we can talk about all of this IRL!
You wrote something along the lines of loving “big” (as I call it) and whole heartedly and you want to continue to do that, but with reciprocity
AND I have never related more to a sentiment.
Truly, to keep showing up BIG in a world that feels like it just consumes as much without giving (we all consume too much content and look for that next like or comment or something) is such important work.
Raising Hell, Living well is an amazing book and I love the other resources you are inspired by and can’t wait to check them out.
Maybe the pendulum is swinging back from the hyper availability, let’s hope, because we all deserve a more IRL connectivity and a little less screen time dopamine hit 🫶
YEsssssss I'm so glad you relate. It is such important work and I love my big heart. The process/practice is all a balancing act and continuing to return again and again to yourself. Let me know what you think of the other resources!
I love the functionality of Spotify in Substack. Just copy and past the link to a song, playlist, or artist and it comes up beautifully. Happy it was enjoyed :)
Re boundaries / relationship with social media: I left Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook more than a year ago, and it's been worth it! At first it is a bit destabilising to let go of that neat, curated 2-D digital persona, and everything it says about you (that you're aesthetic, intelligent, well-travelled, cultured, or so on.) What's even harder is to then sit entirely (and only) with the fleshy, complex, embodied self, and accept all the fraught self-hood that comes up without distractions to run to. It took me a good part of the last year to get used to! But in many ways, it feels like coming home to myself and so much space and depth has finally opened up.
I'm finally back on some sort of social media in the form of Substack, where I'm just starting to share more. But I'm optimistic that this will feel somewhat different from the hamster wheels of other social media!
Yay to take a break and yay to returning back on Substack (welcome!) It is such uncomfy yet important work to take a look at those stories and identities. I'm so happy the time away seemed to have done it's work and you are able to approach SM in a new, intentional, and refreshed way. Glad this essay resonated :)
Your words resonate sooooo deeply! “In an ideal world, I would like to be so involved in my life (my art, my spiritual practice, my community, my relationships, the awe of the world around me) that I am overflowing with love, wisdom, light, guidance, inspiration to share with the world.” I often picture myself living in the English countryside, writing, listening to music, dancing, drinking tea, practicing yoga, and hosting meditation classes for my local community away from the digital world. But I do believe that as creatives, we possess special gifts to offer and we’d not be doing our work justice by not sharing it with the word, and rightly or wrongly social media can be a powerful tool for connecting with individuals who will be touched by our content. While I'm still exploring the ideal balance, I'm actively working on shifting my mindset. Is social media truly as draining as I perceive it to be, or is it my relationship with it that requires attention? It tends to be an energy drainer rather than a giver, leaving me feeling depleted instead of energised so I’m still working on the answers too!
Mmmmmmm I love ALL of this. Yes to slow living and being more engaged with my real life rather than online life. But I so agree that there is a lot of good and also it is necessary for us to share our gifts with the world. I want to really hope that there is a way to find a healthy relationship with being online but I also think that as an artist, you need to be really strong with the boundaries you place around your creative practice and creative integrity. I also think it's perfectly ok to take a break! Kinda like a silent meditation retreat! Except going off the grid for a lil to connect back to yourself. Keep me posted on where this exploration leads xo
Agreeeed! At least a little space to come back reinvigorated and able to show up with more presence and intention. Glad it resonated, excited to see what unfolds!
Reciprocity is something I've been sitting with for so long in regards to social media. The quick scrolling and mindless nature of it has created this environment where everything is desensitized, and there isn't any honor for the depth of what people are showing up with and sharing. And, more importantly, honor for what they surely have walked through to be able to show up with that. I feel like we spoke about this over matcha. So I hear you, and I see you, and also celebrate you. Your presence is a beautiful light. xo
Definitely. I have noticed that since short form video content is more and more prioritized, no one cares to read the long captions or engage with the actual people they follow. Like years ago, I'd hardly ever go to my discover page and now that's where the majority of my consumption lies. All of the love right back at you, my dear. Glad to be in this work alongside you x
Such an important article Nikki. I always wonder what would life have been like or be like now if I didn’t work so much or waste my time on social media. What would I be doing? I’m going to put some walls up too and see what it feels like. You are an inspiration to me. You are a lighthouse in a storm. Thank you for risking and sharing!
Love you so much! Thank you for the support. I like to ask myself when I am in a loop of mindless scrolling, "what is something more supportive that I could be doing right now?" Or...can I face a few moments of just doing nothing? (Sounds scary lol)
Hi Nikki! In true "me" form....I am just finding this. Thank you so much for reading my book and for loving all over the pages in the very way I hoped readers would. Seeing it here all these months later has made my day. Love the whole thing actually. Xx Jess
Hi Jess! It means so much to me that you read this and commented. Your book was one of my favorite reads of last year and I have a feeling I will continue to return to it over and over again. Thank you for writing it! And for sharing all that you do. I hope one day our paths cross and we can talk about all of this IRL!
You wrote something along the lines of loving “big” (as I call it) and whole heartedly and you want to continue to do that, but with reciprocity
AND I have never related more to a sentiment.
Truly, to keep showing up BIG in a world that feels like it just consumes as much without giving (we all consume too much content and look for that next like or comment or something) is such important work.
Raising Hell, Living well is an amazing book and I love the other resources you are inspired by and can’t wait to check them out.
Maybe the pendulum is swinging back from the hyper availability, let’s hope, because we all deserve a more IRL connectivity and a little less screen time dopamine hit 🫶
YEsssssss I'm so glad you relate. It is such important work and I love my big heart. The process/practice is all a balancing act and continuing to return again and again to yourself. Let me know what you think of the other resources!
We enjoyed the listen while you read function, going to have to figure out that one. Though admittedly that might send us down the rabbit hole!
I love the functionality of Spotify in Substack. Just copy and past the link to a song, playlist, or artist and it comes up beautifully. Happy it was enjoyed :)
And yes! This article really speaks to me. Imagining an embodied, unplugged life is so vital! I'm glad you've sparked this conversation.
Re boundaries / relationship with social media: I left Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook more than a year ago, and it's been worth it! At first it is a bit destabilising to let go of that neat, curated 2-D digital persona, and everything it says about you (that you're aesthetic, intelligent, well-travelled, cultured, or so on.) What's even harder is to then sit entirely (and only) with the fleshy, complex, embodied self, and accept all the fraught self-hood that comes up without distractions to run to. It took me a good part of the last year to get used to! But in many ways, it feels like coming home to myself and so much space and depth has finally opened up.
I'm finally back on some sort of social media in the form of Substack, where I'm just starting to share more. But I'm optimistic that this will feel somewhat different from the hamster wheels of other social media!
Yay to take a break and yay to returning back on Substack (welcome!) It is such uncomfy yet important work to take a look at those stories and identities. I'm so happy the time away seemed to have done it's work and you are able to approach SM in a new, intentional, and refreshed way. Glad this essay resonated :)
Your words resonate sooooo deeply! “In an ideal world, I would like to be so involved in my life (my art, my spiritual practice, my community, my relationships, the awe of the world around me) that I am overflowing with love, wisdom, light, guidance, inspiration to share with the world.” I often picture myself living in the English countryside, writing, listening to music, dancing, drinking tea, practicing yoga, and hosting meditation classes for my local community away from the digital world. But I do believe that as creatives, we possess special gifts to offer and we’d not be doing our work justice by not sharing it with the word, and rightly or wrongly social media can be a powerful tool for connecting with individuals who will be touched by our content. While I'm still exploring the ideal balance, I'm actively working on shifting my mindset. Is social media truly as draining as I perceive it to be, or is it my relationship with it that requires attention? It tends to be an energy drainer rather than a giver, leaving me feeling depleted instead of energised so I’m still working on the answers too!
Mmmmmmm I love ALL of this. Yes to slow living and being more engaged with my real life rather than online life. But I so agree that there is a lot of good and also it is necessary for us to share our gifts with the world. I want to really hope that there is a way to find a healthy relationship with being online but I also think that as an artist, you need to be really strong with the boundaries you place around your creative practice and creative integrity. I also think it's perfectly ok to take a break! Kinda like a silent meditation retreat! Except going off the grid for a lil to connect back to yourself. Keep me posted on where this exploration leads xo
Agreeeed! At least a little space to come back reinvigorated and able to show up with more presence and intention. Glad it resonated, excited to see what unfolds!